~ Clarity ~

yesterday while praying, i made myself exercise exactly who God is to me personally because i don't want to become lax or numb to who it is that I am talking to in prayer. I had slipped into being rote in my address to Him, giving no thought of the meaning of His Name. so i called Him 'Rescuer of me in my torment in the past'. This morning I realized that who He's been to me lately is a Shifter & an Adjuster, shifting my focus & adjusting my gaze, shifting priorities & adjusting my schedule. I know He is calibrating my growth & assessing any progress or stagnation. He is strategic and precise. Today I call Him 'Giver of Seasons.' This phrase was in my dream last night. It reminds me of a quotation by Hemingway that I've always liked & accidentally memorized from reading it so much:

"You expected to be sad in the fall. Part of you died each year when the leaves fell from the trees and their branches were bare against the wind and the cold, wintery light. But you knew there would always be the spring, as you knew the river would flow again after it was frozen."

It speaks to me of hope & change.
non sum qualis eram = I am not as I used to be.